Back from hiatus!

Oh gosh, when I decided to revive my blog this morning, I checked back at my last posting and I can't believe that it has been 9-10 months since my last post.

Took a short hiatus because I was swarmed with children and work. Went back into teaching during the second semester to a school that is near my house and just opposite my children's school. However, things didnt work out well as school ended really late for me and by the time I picked my children up from school, it was close to evening and I had to rush preparing dinner before I scoot off for tuition at 630pm.

Did not like having so little time with my children. Did not like asking my children to always have lunch in school which always end up them eating so little and unhealthily. Did not like the fact to hear them complain when they have to stay back in the school library to wait for me to finish class. On the other side, I also face complains from my Sec 3 students as they want me to stay back and give them remedial. They need to see me after school to ask questions etc etc.

So, I guess its better to make one side happy then to make both sides unhappy. That explains my retirement..for the SECOND time. (First time was when Caleb, my older one was about to enter primary one)

Having time now with my children is priceless as I watch them grow and being co-workers with God to raise them up. He has opened my eyes to see my children differently and to be their friend, mentor and coach is definitely a learning process but am definitely embracing it with love.

As a parent volunteer on the first day of school to help out the Primary One Parents, had the opportunity to catch my children during recess. How awesome!

These are wonderful memories that I will treasure forever.

My next season

Women are seasonal creatures, and when we look at our lives in light of the season we are in, we are better able to cope with some of the challenges and are more likely to appreciate the blessings- while we still have them. For example, it may seem that we'll never reach the end of changing diapers, endless cries of babies in the night and wee hours in the early morning or having to deal with sending our children to school or for classes etc.

Suddenly, I will have time in my hands next year while both my children go off to primary school. What will I do when I am all alone at home?

I will definitely miss having spent wonderful quality times with my princess all these time- attending BSF morning class on Mondays, doing household chores together, eating breakfast together, playing together while waiting for the school bus and just simply chatting with each other (*sobsob*)

As much as I will miss a wonderful companion in my mornings, I know that God will be bringing me to another time of life during which I will have new discoveries to make, new roles to play and new blessings to enjoy.

In short, the season has changed.

To be frank, God has prepared me for each season that is come and that's not surprising since I know that God has everything all planned out already as I slowly see His promises from the Bible being fulfilled and unfolded. God wants us to be prepared for our future with Him. I am pretty excited as to know what lies ahead for me- good or bad as I rest in His arms and lean on my Daddy God.

I have learnt so far that this world is not my home. If I were to suffer so that others may come to know Him, it's an honour because God will not give us something we cannot bear and His plan has always been to save us so that we can be with Him in eternity. He cares more for your life after the physical death that your temporal life here on earth.

Of course, with more time next year in the mornings, my plans are to hone my cooking skills. I always love cooking and wish to put in more effort into that next year when I have more time. And one more thing is to EXERCISE! Ever since staying at home, I haven't had the time to do that..(okay, that's an excuse) but my plan is to drop the children off at school in the morning before doing my morning exercise.

But of course, above all, I want to spend more time with my Daddy God- to get to know Him better by sitting at His feet and just enjoying His presence. So though I will be physically all alone at my house, I know I will have the wonderful companionship of my Father.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A path less travelled

Since late last year in December when I started my children on swimming lessons, so many thoughts and images ran through my mind. My children are 5 and 6 years old now and for the longest time, I have been hesitating to sign them up for lessons. One of the reason was I had way too much on my plate and too tired to take them for classes when I was still working as it takes commitment not only for the children but more for the parents as they are the one who is going to drive it.

And the other reason for this hesitation is because of my past. I have started swimming at the age of 3 and started competing since I was 6 years old. Represented the Republic when I was in Primary 4 till I was in JC1. Life as a swimmer from young was not an easy path. It was gruelling, and many times, I just had to either play sick (which most of the time didn't work) or just grit my teeth, wipe my tears away and just do it. I remember there was this one time I saw lightning through the water I was swimming in and also another time when I cut my finger really deeply that I still had to just wrap it up and continue training by swimming with one hand. That was the kind of discipline(if you like to put it) and commitment we had.

Training in Chinese Swimming Club where everyone of your friends also went through the same thing.Waked up early for training at 5:30am till 730am. Rushed to school. Allowed to skip the first lesson of school. Then training again from 4pm-7pm. Then rushed for tuition. My meals were mostly in the cars as I gulped down breakfast and dinner. Of course, there are benefits to what I went through and how I have turned out but would I want this on my children?

So most of my friends who knew me since young all wonder why I have not started my children on swimming and why am I not teaching them on my own? Since December, I signed them up for lessons at my nearest public pool which I found to be reasonably priced for my pocket and my children's experience now is so different from what I went through. Whenever I see them, I start to wonder what kind of children I want them to be- enjoying what they do but end up maybe not as good as they can be or just get a fierce coach, force them to train so that they can be stretched and be good in something...

To be honest, on the contrary of what my friends think, I am not a good swimmer. I just end up doing well because I swim so much. I am sure any child who went through what I went through, would also end up being good in swimming.

Aside from swimming, the other thing was which school should my children go to- branded or neighbourhood? I had the ability to send my children to a branded school since I was from there and I thought it would be fuss free as I do not have to go through any balloting.

Coming from Tao Nan, Raffles Girls' and then Temasek JC, obviously I would send my children to branded schools. Right?

I have never felt stress being in those schools even though I was not a bright student. I enjoyed my education in all those schools- the environment was good and conducive. That was what I wanted for my children too.

So for the longest time, I was dead set to send my children to Tao Nan since I had the opportunity...so why not? But when crunch time came, I opted for a school nearest my house- a neighbourhood school. I do not have a car so it is just a way more practical decision since it is just 10 mins walk from my house.

So the key question that has been asked- is every school a good school? In my opinion, no but all schools do strive to be a good school but I think given the culture and bad reputation of some neighbourhood schools, it is quite difficult and challenging for them to be a good school.

Do I worry now that I placed my child in a neighbourhood school that he may end up bad? On the contrary, I am happy and glad I did. He is a happier learner in this school and hopefully with the teaching and values I have been imparting at home, it is a good foundation for him to withstand most obstacles or temptations he faces in school.

As for which secondary school, I already have in mind but once again, when the time comes, who knows what I may choose?

So the questions I have been asking myself is whether I am short changing my child by sending them to a public pool for swimming lessons with some coach who most likely swim slower than me or when I am sending them to a nearby neighbourhood school where most people would not even have known the existence of such a school in Singapore.

In conclusion, all I want to say is this-no matter how hard I try or not try, we will never be perfect and we can never dictate how our children will turn out as a result of what we do now with them. All I can do is trust the One who created them, who loves them more than I do as I surrender myself to Him.In His time, God will make all things good. So why fret and worry so much?

For the record, my children is happy learning swimming in a public pool and enjoying their school!

 

Like to end off by sharing what I read one day during my quiet time.

GOD'S MERCY

The parenting journey is full of mistakes. We will never be perfect. But, we can be comforted by the fact that God knows us, He knows the mistakes we make, and He loves us just the same. He doesn't expect perfection.

God expects us to offer our parenting as an act of worship. When we renew our minds by internalizing His truth, and parent according to His plan for success, He is pleased. You know what this is like — when your child presented you with a project ...they made you hung it on your wall or refrigerator because it represented their love for you. It wasn't the artistic excellence you prized, but the motivation behind it. It is no different for God.

Renew your mind and parent your kids as a spiritual act of worship to please God.

"Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." (Romans 12:1, 2 NIV)

The reality of Primary School

Finally, I am facing up to my fears (as if I have a choice) - Primary School! Fears definitely created by the environment and people as horror stories from the weight of their school bags, to never-ending homework, out-of-this world, seemingly-impossible-to-solve, long essay Math questions that confuses both the children as well as the adults and as well as stress by the teachers and principal to perform as they prepare the kid from Primary 4 onwards for the PSLE which is taken in Primary 6!

This is why I quit my teaching career of 10 years to guide my children..so that we can probably face this together ( I think I am more frightened than they are since they are ignorant of what is to come) but that is not the main reason. I felt convicted that the responsibility of raising my children and household matters should not be left to my helper. In the end, I do not know how my children will turn out but at least I know I have tried my best as a mother to be there for them as I continue to trust God to give me the wisdom to guide them.

So far, I have to admit, my fears are unfounded. So far, the school bag is not as heavy as what most make it to be. I have to give credit to my son's school who prepares a list for the first 2 weeks of Orientation to bring their books to school per subject to be kept in their locker. So now that official lessons have started, his bag is just made up of his pencil box, his school journal notebook, storybook and only one or two textbooks. Its relatively light.

Regret buying such a big bag for him

On his first day of school, he seemed to be able to cope well. My boy has grown up!

 

 

 

The school only allowed the parents to see them in the canteen. So during recess when I went back to visit him, he was all over the place. After eating, he started hanging out with his buddy.

 

 



I had the feeling he didn't need me around as he was happily walking with his friends. So just after peaking at him for a minute or two, I decided to go back home.

Viewing our children from outside the canteen made it seems like they are animal exhibits

Anyway, I am just thankful that I have chosen a school near my house and also am happy so far at the way things are running as the Parent Support Group is quite good. They have set up whatsapp group for parents of the various Primary one classes and by joining the whatsapp group, we are kept in the loop and can link up with other parents whose child is in the same class.

The Parents Group aim to set up for all other levels too. They also include the chairman or Vice-Chairman in the Whatsapp group to guide us in any way if we have any questions.

So far for 2 weeks in school, Caleb seemed to do ok. He looks forward to PE lesson so that he can run about! As for homework, it is manageable.

I know the road ahead is only going to get tougher but frankly speaking, I am comforted and assured for I know the Lord is with me and helping me as always.

My son's graduating..

I still remember vividly the time Caleb was in Nursery during his school concert as I watched the K2 students performing and receiving their certificates. During that time, I thought to myself that I would surely cry when he is up there getting his graduation certificate. Never did I realise, it's now his turn to be in K2 and graduating from Kindergarten.

Because of all the preparation that I would cry in his graduation concert, eventually, I didn't. Phew. Caleb kept telling me before his concert not to cry and I was obedient.

Both Caleb's and Danielle's performances went so well and I felt so proud of them both.

Here are my stars..

All of the children practised so hard and the concert was really a blast!

After the concert, Danielle had some invitations to take pictures with the boys in class. Her teacher did comment that she is the class belle and many boys like her. I am glad Danielle is not enjoying this kind of attention as she was fleeing from them when they wanted a picture with her. 

I finally told Danielle that it's just a picture..be sporting. So after much coaxing, she took a picture with them.

Caleb, too took some pictures with his friends..

My mother-in-law and dad also attended.

And there's my dad with our Senior Pastor of  this church who is my dad's long time friend for over 20 years. Both from Auckland University. Glad to see them finally connected!

And here below is Joshie- Danielle's classmate and church mate. All of them love playing together.

Caleb once commented that he wished Josh is his brother. I told him that he is as we are all brothers and sisters in Christ. Caleb also hoped that they can stay next door to each other. Well, that's how much they enjoy one another..

That's me and my dad, enjoying the view at the roof top garden in church.

Am so glad to see my dad and mother-in-law join us for this wonderful concert!

Caleb and Danielle: Daddy and Mummy are so proud of you and ever will be!

Primary One Registration Woes

It has been the time which as a parent, I have been dreading... Last year, whenever parents came up to me and asked me what school will I be enrolling my son in, I always brushed it off by saying, "Aiyah, still long la. I dont wish to think about it.." But now, when the time has finally come, I have no choice but to face it and bear the brunt of it.

Initially, I did think of putting Caleb in my alma mater which is the sought after school in Singapore- Tao Nan Primary. I thought of that not so my son could go into a famous and popular school but because I dont wish to go through the balloting and the waiting..

But finally, I thought the only thing that makes sense is somewhere near where I stay as going to school is a daily affair and if I choose a school too far away, I will probably dread it and regret. I will definitely appreciate the convenience.

So, I chose Horizon Primary which is a fairly new school (about 4-5 years) but yet it has its processes all in place. It is still within 1 km away from my house. Went for the open house and liked it. So I enrolled Caleb during the Phase 2C Registration.

However, I had to face the dreaded balloting as there were only 143 vacancies and about 210 people registered. Went for the balloting alone not so much because I was anxious but because I was curious and wanted to experience it for myself.

The hall was filled up with anxious parents and as for me, I was more curious than anxious. I knew that if I did not get a place here in Horizon, I would get it somewhere else as I had a backup plan already and moreover, as a Christian, I know God loves Caleb more than me. So He would have thought of everything and has a school in mind already for him. So there's really nothing for me to worry.

Finally, Caleb did not get a place in Horizon..

In my own human understanding, to me, Horizon is the best school for Caleb but now that he wasnt selected, I knew God had other plans and His ways are definitely higher than ours as He is infinite. He sees the future. So I was more curious and excited as to what God has planned for Caleb than to be disappointed.

Anyway, this morning, went to Greendale Primary School to register for Caleb for his Phase 2C Supplementary Registration. Greendale is a school even nearer to my house than Horizon. It's actually half the walking time.

Now I just have to wait and see if this is what God wants and leave it to Him!

I just cant wait for this to be over and pray there wont be another balloting....