Friday, August 06, 2010

Without Vicky...(Part I)

Posted by Dawn at Friday, August 06, 2010
Almost the end of August, Vicky's dad passed away suddenly in his sleep. I was at a loss as she wanted to go back and I didn't know what arrangements should I think about when she's gone- do I bring my children over to my parent's place or in-laws? How about Caleb's school bus? Do I get a temporary helper? But even if I have a temporary helper, I wouldn't know how much I can trust the new one. I probably still need to place the helper and the children at someone's house. I was very helpless.

There have been nights and days when I could just cry out to God to help me because there's just too much options and too little time to decide. Which is the best? Finally, CT suggested that I can also take no pay leave which I didn't think of. It was a brilliant idea as that would minimise any disruptions. Life would still go on for the children. Well, so I went ahead to apply for my no pay leave...and of course, it still wasn't so smooth. Encountered some obstacles but thank God, managed to finally take leave (3 weeks as she needs to renew her passport back in Phillipines) and to prepare myself mentally and physically for what is to come as I spend time alone with the kids during the day.

We, as a family, sent Vicky off at the airport. Getting tickets for her was also another obstacle which we faced as her passport's validity was less than 6 months. The airlines refused to issue her a ticket. So we kept calling and speaking to different sales guy and finally, we booked the flight for her. Sigh.

Surprisingly the kids didn't even kick up any fuss when she left. We simply explained to them and they just accepted it without any questions or expression of longing for Vicky. Thank God.

For the first week, I had a wonderful time carrying out my role as mother and wife- spending quality time with them by cooking for them, fetching Caleb to the school bus, putting the children to sleep, doing laundry, ironing, vacuuming the floor, mopping the floor, cleaning the toilets, making the beds etc.

Here's some pictures of Danielle having lunch which I personally prepared for her!
Stir fried veggies dish and pork ribs...

And noodles with chicken, pumpkin soup.

And fruits after her lunch

My mornings were more or less fixed. The children would wake up at about 730am. Brush their teeth. Serve breakfast (e.g cakes, bread, cereal). Bathe them together. Change them. Switch on the TV while I go do my own stuff on the computer (e.g emails, read online news, facebooking, blogging, games etc) till about 945am when I go prepare Caleb for his school by changing him to his uniform, preparing his water bottle and school bag.

At 10am, I go down with Danielle to send Caleb off to the school bus as it comes at about 1010am. Then I would sometimes bring Danielle to the playground or bring her straight back home and put her to sleep for her morning nap. She would sleep till about 12 plus pm. So I have about one and a half to two hours of personal time.

During this time, I may choose to do housework like laundry, iron the clothes and at the same time, watch TV in my computer. I love to multi-task as I get lots of things done in a short period of time.

Though it is a major shift from my regular work in school, I enjoyed myself as it felt really rewarding as I would accomplish quite a lot of things during the day. I was quite proud of myself.

Almost everyday, I would have piles and piles of unending amount of clothes for me to wash and iron. Its crazy. I really pity Vicky now that I know how much she has to 'suffer' doing all this!

Then Danielle would wake up from her morning nap and have her lunch. After lunch, she would watch Hi-5 till about 2 plus. Then she would play till its time to go pick Caleb up from school at 330pm.

Sometimes, Danielle may be tired again after lunch and at about 230pm, she may go back to sleep. So while she was sleeping at home, I would quickly scooter off to pick Caleb up from his school bus down at my block as I pray Danielle doesn't wake up. Thank God, of all the times I left her alone in the house sleeping, she did not wake up. In fact, she would be sleeping so soundly for about 2 to 3 hours. As for Caleb, when he comes home from school, he doesn't really sleep since he would sleep during the bus ride. Only rarely, he may request to nap.

So they would sleep till about 4pm. Then I would play with them after that. At times, I would do art and craft with them and since National Day was around the corner, I printed out a Singapore flag for them to colour and use chopsticks to stick on it so that they can wave the flag around.

Then they would watch TV while I go prepare dinner till CT comes home.

Sometimes when Caleb is off to school, I would bring Danielle out if she is not too tired. I even took train with her to Kovan and just walked around. It was fun spending alone time with her.

I am not sure how long I can last without Vicky...


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